Friday, September 09, 2005

Rhymes of Passion

These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line but the least romantic second line.

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
but I only slept with you, because I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other.
Until, that is, I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue,
sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting,
the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty
and so is your head.

Of loving beauty you float with grace.
If only you could hide your face.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
this describes everything you are not.

I want to feel your sweet embrace
but don't take that paper bag off of your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes,
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

My feelings for you no words can tell
except for maybe "go to hell."

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I think of life without you I feel a sense of dread,
But when the PMS kicks in, I wish you were dead

4:52 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love you more
Than a summer's day
But why oh why
Must you be gay?

1:33 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ahem!
"Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss.
but I only slept with you, because I was pissed"....

is it sad that i actually did that? hmmmm...

3:21 pm  
Blogger sarah (tales of ordinary madness) said...

these are hilarious - my fingers are itching to text some of these gems to the boyfriend! i'll save them for a particularly bitter day though :).

5:31 pm  

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